We've Moved

Yes, we've moved. Please vist us at www.carpediemwithjasmine.com 

Be sure to subscribe to our RSS feed on the new site!

 

See you at www.carpediemwithjasmine.com

 

 

CARPE DIEM 

When You Don't Know What You Want to Seize (My 1st VLOG)

I'm in Oakland, CA this weekend attending a funeral.

The mother of one of my dear friends, in fact one of the first friends I made when I moved to Minneapolis passed away.  It's bitter sweet this weekend because my friend is saying goodbye to her mother... which in my opinion is GONE TO SOON. The sweet is the fact that I've reunited with two of my friends. We use to eat together almost every Sunday night and watch Grey's Anatomy and Desperate Housewives over a home cooked meal that one of us prepared.  It was a Sunday evening ritual that I enjoyed for a couple of years. Our personal journeys have now taken us in different directions and we no longer reside in the same city.

Anyway, all of us are in some type of transition in our personal and professional lives. One of my friends who is trying reignite her inner spark asked me over coffee at Starbucks yesterday morning in the mist of our errands and assisting in final funeral and repast preparations...Miss Carpe Diem, how do you seize the day when you don't even what you want you want to seize? GOOD QUESTION! As she asked the question she began to film me on her iPhone. So here's my reply. I decided to post it as a VLOG. My very 1st VLOG! (Side note: I love "virgin experiences." )

To summarize my thoughts on how one can begin to seize the day in the mist of confusion you:

1. Assume an attitude of gratitude

2. Recognize and accept your personal state of mind or "place"

3. Become OPEN to possibilities (I'm open to UNLIMITED possibilities)

CARPE DIEM

ps- I'm in the process of relaunching my blog. What did you think of the VLOG? Would you like more vlogs? Leave a comment and let me know what you're thinking! THANKS

Missed Opportunity

"Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great. Weak men wait for opportunities; strong men make them."

- Orison Sett Marden



Last week I was at on the treadmill and watching a segment on CBS this Morning about Justice Clarence Thomas making history by breaking his streak of seven years of silence on the bench. The piece went on to explain that the other Supreme Court Justices can be very abrasive towards lawyers presenting arguments with disrespectful comments.  After watching the piece I thought WOW...how cool would it be to see a case argued in the Supreme Court live and in person. Maybe I'll take a day off from work sometime this year and take in day of arguments at the Supreme Court. Then I thought Jasmine you went to college in Washington, DC; you could have easily have gone a spent a day, two days, even a week at the Supreme Court. You missed the opportunity. A missed opportunity.

Link to video from CBS this Morning Story

Then earlier this week I was at the the 57th Presidential Inauguration. Standing immediately over to the left of the row I was sitting in was Paula Abdul. A bunch of people (like me) took pictures of her but a few people actually walked over to her to take a picture with her. I wanted to take a picture with her but I thought I would be respectful her personal time and allow her to enjoy her time at the inauguration. Later that evening I sent her a tweet and she mentioned that "she would've LOVED to meet me and take pic." A missed opportunity.

The evening that I returned home from Washington, DC this week  I received a phone call from a dear friend asking me to call her back that night no matter what time I picked up her voicemail.  I obliged and called her back around 11:30 PM.  She had bad news to share, her mother had lost her battle to cancer and passed away on Monday. SHOCK ran through my body. I knew her mom had been ill but I didn't think or know she was THAT ill. I was reminded that my friend had called me the week before and in her voicemail she said she was just calling to catch-up. Since I had no major new developments to report and due my "busyness" I had yet to return her call. A missed opportunity.

As a person that lives by the mantra Carpe Diem...Seize the Day I've had my share of missed opportunities. It's impossible to do everything but my challenge to myself and to you is to make sure you are doing the RIGHT things and the IMPORTANT things...don't allow those things to become missed opportunities due to busyness, fear, laziness and complacency, the weather, not having your hair done, not having anything to wear, etc. because you never know if you'll get another opportunity.

“Your regrets aren't what you did, but what you didn't do. So I take every opportunity.”
― Cameron Diaz

 

Carpe Diem

I Know that I Know

HAPPY HAPPY NEW YEAR!

One of my OWN Ambassadors shared this video with our group a few weeks ago and I finally took the time to BE STILL, WATCH &PROCESS it.

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/The-Age-of-Miracles-The-New-Midlife-After-the-Show-Video

I’m in Hawaii currently and last night I randomly ended up in two conversations about “expecting.”  In all honesty, I EXPECT a miracle every day! In my heart of heart, flowing through my veins and even pushing on the soles of my shoes I KNOW that God has blessed me and will continue to bless me and for his blessings I am very COGNIZANT & THANKFUL. With that being said I also understand the blessings and favor he continues to shower on me comes with responsibility.

So on this 3^rd day of this new year I want you to  ask yourself a few questions:

-          What is your REALITY?

-          Are you OPEN to the possibilities?

-          What do you KNOW in your core? (My mom use to say I know that I know that I know) What do you  know that you know you know?

-          How are you USING your CALLING?

It’s so easy to get out alignment by becoming comfortable and complacent and by settling for “good enough,” but GOD has blessed all of our lives and he is calling us to be ALL THAT WE CAN BE and all that we can be is personal! He has specific agendas and purposes for our lives. Each persons’ walk is different and worth discovering and acting on.

My challenge to you and myself  in the first 30 days of this year is to take some time to be STILL, LISTEN & KNOW.   Drown out those voices in your head and around you. (A great book recommendation that will help you with the voices in your head….Untethered Soul by Michael Singer).

After you get alignment or realignment get about the business that is your divinely purpose.   BE ALL THAT HE IS CALLING YOU TO BE!  Life is too short and it’s moving to quick not to be on purpose.

DREAM BIG

CREATE the miracle yourself

Remember THOUGHTS become WORDS that become ACTIONS that become REALITY.

It’s a NEW YEAR….it’s time to do the DAMN THING!

CARPE DIEM

Happy Birthday Jesus

I wasn't feeling very well yesterday and really not in the Christmas spirit. Today I woke up refreshed, feeling better and reminded that the whole reason behind celebrating today is celebrating Jesus’ birthday!

I've been shopping and storing things for the "Christmas" since October and I managed to pack up all the stuff I bought in three suitcases to bring home with me to Atlanta. Since I've been commuting back and forth to NYC the Christmas season was a little different for me this year. I didn't put up my normal Christmas tree, Christmas dish towels, nutcrackers, poinsettias or bowls of pretty decorative ornaments. I didn't even hang the Christmas cards that were sent to me like I normally do. However, I did manage to make a donation to the homeless service project my church held last weekend and I spent the weekend before last volunteering at a Santa Store for children whose families shop at a Food Bank in North Minneapolis. In retrospect those were the best things I did all Christmas season!

I'm happy to be home in Atlanta with my mom, dad, Merlot (our family cat), Johnny, close family friends and sleeping in the room that for many years I called my room. I'm also thankful for the time that I got to spend fellowshipping with friends before I left Minneapolis. I'm reminded this morning and slightly convicted in my remembrance that Jesus is the true reason for the season.

It's unfortunate that Christmas has become secular and people have forgotten that it's Jesus' birthday not a key sales period for retailers and businesses. As a Christian I believe that Jesus came to give HOPE and LOVE to a dark world. He came to spread the promises of our heavenly father and to die for our sins.

So this Christmas my friends I give you LOVE. If you don't have the honor of spending today with loved ones. Know that God loves you and that's why he sent Jesus so many years ago on this day.

"And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love."

~ 1 Corinthians 13:13

 

 

 

Happy Birthday Jesus & Merry Christmas!

  For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Isaiah 9:6

For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 

Luke 2:11

 

Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift. 2 Corinthians 9:15



CARPE DIEM

 

Be Nice to Me...I'm a Human Being

What does a hello cost?

How much energy are you exerting when you smile?

Do you have the time to sincerely ask someone how they are doing, listen to their answer and reply accordingly?

Were you taught to mind your manners as a child? If so, are you still minding them today..do you say please and thank you?

We live in a extremely fast-paced world, almost everything we do is in a rush to meet some sort of deadline, timeline or schedule. We rapidly move from meeting to meeting in the office, to rushing home to pick-up kids for after school activities or to the gym or after work meeting to grabbing dinner, heading to bed and starting the cycle all over again. We go through the motions when it comes to spending quality time with our families, friends and loved ones. True meaningful connections are a void in our daily life.

Jonathan Franzen stated in his book Freedom that for a generation with such modern conveniences we live the most inconvenienced lives. Think about when was the last time you were actually fully present and in the moment of an activity or conversation? You weren't multi-tasking....thinking about work, texting, tweeting, reading an e-mail or mentally somewhere else?

Our country is in a national state of mourning due to the tragic murder of 20 children and 6 adults in Newtown, CT. last Friday. Right now there is a heightened sensitivity and in our vulnerable state we as a society and community of citizens appear to be a little nicer and connected.

We're saying hello

We're smiling

We genuinely have concern for how our neighbors are doing

It's unfortunate that it takes tragedy to remind us to engage in civil discourse and to mind our manners. It's my desire that our current state of concern and friendliness towards fellow man will become a new way of living in our country.

After all,  

A HELLO cost nothing!

It takes more energy to frown than it does to smile.

Sincerely asking someone how they are doing  and listening to their reply may be the silver lining in their cloudy day.

Your mom and grandmother would be so proud to see you minding your manners!

Let's make a commitment to not only remember but to practice the Golden Rule...Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

CARPE DIEM

One of my favorite childhood animals, was a stuffed bean that said "Be Nice to Me...I'm a Human Bean"

Perspective

I woke up yesterday morning with the word perspective top of mind!  When I think about perspective I envision two people standing in a museum looking at the same picture.  One person sees a terrible thunderstorm and the other person sees people dancing in the rain.

How can that be....aren't the two people look at the SAME picture?
I contend that they see the painting differently because they are looking at it with different internal lenses.  Those internal lenses provide their perspective.  For many perspective is based on external factors that alter their internal lenses....comfort level, community, politics, family, friends, work environment, the weather and sometimes the alignment of the moon and stars can all affect one's perspective.

I live in Minneapolis and I really do enjoy living in the "Minnie Apple"....June through October. Ask me how life is in Minneapolis around January 14th and I'll tell you I'm ready to pack my things and move back south. How can that be when two months ago I was in love with the city?  Dry, brittle, Old Man Winter has showed up and changed my perspective on a city that I really do enjoy living in.

Have you ever been in a rut?  Doing the same thing day after day, with the same people day after day, telling and laughing at the same jokes day after day.  In that case a little trip somewhere different, a conversation with a old college friend or a visit to a local nursing home could provide a much needed change of perspective to get you out of your rut.

So today I ask you what is your perspective?
From what internal lenses are are you viewing things?
Are they lenses of fear, scarcity, negativity or a lenses of joy, gratitude, happiness and abundance?
Are you in a rut?
Do you need to change your perspective?

Carpe Diem

The Walking Wounded

This past Sunday I was laying in bed, listening to the white noise of the television and reading a book which was a collection of journal entries from a diverse group of people from around the world.

As I read everyone's personal story of their life's journey it dawned on me that these people like so many people in the world (me included) were the WALKING WOUNDED.

Walking Wounded is defined as:
1. People who have been injured in a battle or major accident who are still able to walk
2. People who have suffered emotional wound

We are the walking wounded because we carry the wounds of past disappointments, hurts, mistakes, failed relationships....the hiccups of life around with us.  The wounds don't paralyze us but they affect us as we strive to live productive lives, create and maintain healthy relationships. The good thing is that most of the wounds heal with time but they often leave a reminder like a scar or keloid reminding of us of the wound.

So my question is how do you handle your wounds and the scars they leave?

I contend that our lives are like mosaics. Our experiences the good, the bad, the ugly and the indifferent are the pieces of broken tile that come together to make something beautiful. I've decided to embrace all my wounds and scars but I'm not going to allow them to paralyze me.

Carpe Diem

Uncertainty, Trust & Faith

I haven't posted a Thought from Jasmine in a VERY long time. It's been on my "to do list" for days, weeks and months; yet I never find the time to post but that's changing today!

My life took a big change on June 18, 2012 when I was informed that I was being "displaced" by my employer for the past 8 years. Truth be told (since I'm being honest) it was beyond time for me to go and the "displacement" I experienced was the forced motivation I needed to get moving.

 Moving to what?????

That's the million dollar answer! I've always been one of those people that appeared to be a "free spirit" but in reality I was a very calculated and planned person. I didn't make a move unless I had a pretty clear understanding of what the outcome was going to be and was able to see the entire picture and since I'm being honest that's probably the reason I overstayed my time with my previous employer. I knew I needed to move on and I wanted to move on but I couldn't see the full picture and that scared me.

So this is a new walk for me. A walk in UNCERTAINTY, a walk in TRUST and a walk in FAITH! I'm not sure what exactly the end will be. I still have my "list" of things to do, places to go, people to meet, experiences to experience and I know without a doubt I'll scratch off the all things on my list. But ask me where I'm going to be living 6 months from now and I can't answer that question and probably for the first time in my life I'm okay with the UNCERTAINTY.

My mom gave me a scripture to stand on in August and it's been my guiding principle during this walk of uncertainty, trust and faith. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight (Proverbs 3:5-6).

Have you ever walked in uncertainty, trust and faith?

Here's a link to a little exercise I did to further practice walking in uncertainty, trust and faith…ENJOY!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DHI_X9zM0pc&feature=youtube_gdata_player

CARPE DIEM

The Foundation

I've totally---well let's say I've altered my lifestyle a great deal. I wouldn't say that I'm a "gym rat," but the gym and making good decisions on my daily food intake have become a vital part of my life. I've lost a great deal of weight (over 30 pounds) in the last year and a half in part to my new lifestyle and the large amount of money I give Lifetime Fitness on a monthly basis. Anyway I say all of this to provide a little "background."

I was emailing back and forth with my old trainer, who recently relocated to Dallas, TX- last week about our lives- "I’m still working out with Alex! You were right we’re a good fit for each other, but I MISS you. So are you making friends, going on dates? Have you found a place yet? Doesn’t sound like you’re having too much of a social life…just a lot of work and workouts." Then I wrote something that really stuck a nerve, it sent a chill down my spine....

Remember BALANCE is the key to everything in life…that’s why the foundation is so important!

How's your foundation?

Due to my lifestyle changes I would venture to say that my physical foundation is solid. I've always been "strong," but I've done a lot and continue to do a lot of exercises that focus on strengthening my core so that I can be physically balanced. On the other side of the spectrum, I beleive that like old hymn of grace, The Solid Rock, my spiritual foundation is built on faith in Christ, "On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand; All other ground is sinking sand..." However, there are a few areas in my life where the foundation could use a little reinforcement...what about you?

I'm striving for a life filled with love, joy, happiness, purpose and abundant blessings, but I know in order for me to achieve this goal everything I do must be built on a solid foundation in order to maintain perfect balance.


Remember BALANCE is the key to everything in life…that’s why the foundation is so important!

I have learned...

A few months ago I decided that I was going to be like Paul (the apostle) and be content in all situations. I was no longer going to play these self torturing mind games of If I did ----, made this amount of money, lived -----, lost twenty pounds, got married or had a baby that life would be PERFECT! More importantly I decided I was going to fully embrace my current state.

But then something happened a few weeks ago. I’m not exactly sure how it happened, but I walked right into a pity party going on in the middle of my living room. I love a party just like the next person however; I’ve never been a big fan of pity parties. I was sucked in; sulking and singing woe is me…it was a bad sight. Fortunately, for me and my peace of mind the party was interrupted by a phone call from a girlfriend telling me she was in the neighborhood and was going to stop by for a glass of wine. I quickly pulled myself together and placed the” happy face” on. Little did I know, but my girlfriend had been having her own pity party before she arrived at my house. My attractive girlfriend who happens to be a successful entrepreneur with a beautiful house, loving husband, supportive family and adorable children had been experiencing insecurities and frustrations in her life too. She was venting about the fact that her beautiful house needed to be cleaned, her loving husband and supportive family members were for some reason getting on her last nerve and to top it all off her adorable children were interrupting her sleep at night.

Our conversation and time together re-confirmed my original thought that like Paul we need to learn to be content in all in situations. There is no such thing as PERFECT. Just when we think we’ve got it all set, all figured out, were in a great place, BOOM something happens that if we allow it to by giving it credence and validation can mentally set us back or allow a pity party to invade our personal space. It’s the nature of the beast.

My mom always says, “Jasmine you just keep on living.” That’s all we can do…live our lives for ourselves, to the best of our abilities, contently marching to our own beat!

…For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content.
Philippians 4:11

Sex and the City

This my first published thought of 2008.

First let me say I can't believe how fast time flies. I cannot believe that it is May 29, 2008. We are almost halfway through 2008.


Anyway, I'm really excited....excited about what you may ask? Well Sex and the City(SATC)...the MOVIE comes out tomorrow and I am actually going to see it at 12:01 AM CST!

As I sit here gearing up to go to the movie, I have started to reflect on why I liked the show so much that I would actually stay up late on a school night to go see a movie at 12:01 AM. Since the show debuted I have had countless conversations with friends trying to determine which SATC leading lady we are most like. I have gone to NYC at least 3 times for Sex and the City weekends with various girlfriends. I don't know how many girlfriends openly admit they own a rabit or how many times I have seen each episode of the entire series (given the fact that you can watch every night on TBS).

I believe what SATC has given my generation is a pragmatic glimpse of single life through the eyes of someone else. It provided a tinted look of what it is like for 20/30 somethings in the 21st Century. There are several components of the show that are unrealistic or too over the top for me to digest, but at the end of the day it provided some comfort to know that it's okay to go from CONFIDENT and FABULOUS to SCARED SHITLESS in 20 seconds. It showed me that no matter what the exterior looks like it's the inside that really counts. It's provided dating advice without needing to pick up the phone. More importantly SATC has stressed the importance of having GREAT GIRLFRIENDS (GGs)!

So to all my GGs, THANK YOU. Thank you for being a phone call away. Thank you for listening to me repeat the same story over and over again. Thank you for stopping (or at least attempting to stop me) from doing something foolish. Thank you for the solicited and sometimes unsolictited perspective and advice you have provided. Thank you for being there to wipe away tears. Thank you for always having my back!

We are friends for life.

When we're together the years fall away.

Isn't that what matters?

To have someone who can remeber with you?

To have someone who remembers how far you've come!

-Judy Blume

Here's to SEX and the CITY!

Everything Happens for Reason

Does it?

Why do premature deaths happen, why are people laid off from their jobs, why are women raped, innocent children killed, why do some people go to bed hungry...the list goes on and on.

I'm really not sure why we experience bad things or suffer from unpleasantries, but on the other hand I don't know why we experience good things; love, happiness, unexpected blessings even luck as some would call it.

It's funny how we question the bad things in life and not the perceived good things. I believe that our lives are similar to mosaics. Our experiences, both the good and bad, our personal victories and regrets are the colorful pieces of tile, glass and stone that make up our mosaics. That being the case everything does happen for a reason. Our experiences shape and form our lives into beautiful pictures like the tile, glass and stone that make mosaics art. We need all of our experiences both the good and the bad to complete our pictures.

Everything does happen for a reason.



For those that may need a visual check out: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mosaic

Life is Short

I've always believed that life is short. No one knows the moment, second, minute, hour, day month or year they are going to die. One could choke on a chicken bone or go peacefully in their sleep one night. The point that I am trying to make is that no one is invincible and as Chris Rock said in No Sex,"...you're gonna to die."

Knowing that I am going to die has made me very intentional about the life I live. Those that personally know me, know that my personal mantra is Carpe Diem (Seize the day). I believe we have to make it our personal mission to seize the day. No one is going to make sure you are happy, that you spent enough time with your family, that you took vacation or that you went to the doctor for your yearly physical. It is each individuals responsibility to make sure that they are seizing the day.

I think Americans are obsessed with status, toys, tittles and money, but do those things really add to our life. They may provide temporary happiness, but they don't define people. When we die it's not the things that will miss us nor will they be our legacy. It's the people and the lives we have touched that will be impacted the most by our time here on earth.

Take some time to reflect on the life you are living. Are you living each day to it's fullest? Remember each day is a gift that's why they call it the present!

CARPE DIEM

Relationships are like Split Ends

I didn't run out of thoughts. I took a little summer vacation, but I'm back now and I have lots of thoughts!

I just got of the phone with a friend and her situation reminded me of one my favorite JBS original quotes..."sometimes relationships are like split ends and they need to be cut" This can apply to both sexes, but I think women will really understand the point I'm trying to make.

Sometimes a woman goes to the hairdresser and is told she needs to get her split ends trimmed. For what ever reason she decides that she doesn't want to cut her hair. Relationships are like the split ends the woman at the hairdresser doesn't want cut. At times we end up in relationships (romantic and platonic relationships) that we know are on a slow train to NOWHERE. Instead of being proactive and ending the relationship, WE STAY. Why do we stay when we know there is no future....is it the companionship, the fun we have with the other person, sex, a fear of being alone or the status that the other person represents (I'm sure you could add a few to the list too)?

When a woman finally does cut the split ends her hair is healthier, shinier and prettier. And more importantly it grows back stronger. Similarly when we end relationships that are not nourishing to our entire being we make room for healthy, loving, positive relationships.

Do you have any split ends that need to be cut?

When I...

I'm convinced that most Americans live in a constant state of "When I."

When I get a new job...
When I lose 10 pounds...
When I get the kids off to college...
When I get married...
When I turn 30...
When I get a promotion...
When I make a little more money...
When I retire...

The list goes on an on an on an on.

I find that most people are so consumed with reaching whatever the "when I" state is they fail to enjoy the journey that is life. They don't enjoy the phase of life they are currently in nor do they really appreciate the things (materialistic and non materialistic) they have already been blessed with.

Perhaps the most ironic thing is that "when I" never ends. It's a never ending cycle.

I am a firm believer in goals, plans and dreams, but we need to make sure we aren't missing the forest for the trees as we strive for our personal "when I." It's our duty to enjoy the journey that is life and to take time to smell the roses along the way to "when I."

A Dream Deferred

A Dream Deferred
by Langston Hughes

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun? Or fester like a sore-- And then run? Does it stink like rotten meat? Or crust and sugar over-- like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?

Misunderstood

Sometimes the best things in life are those which are often misunderstood.

I remember when I was younger (and even recently) my mother warning me not to become common. She was basically telling me to dare to be different in an "old school....read in between the lines" kind of way. She was encouraging me to go against the grain.

So often we become common as we fall prey to the status quo. We do things because other people are doing them, we fall victim to peer pressure or we try to keep up with "The Jones." The status quo is not necessarily a bad thing. In common land, people are often accepted and quite comfortable, but why settle for comfort when you can be GREAT?

It's okay to be misunderstood. Look at Albert Einstein, Terell Owens, Kanye West, Wendy Williams, Hillary & Bill Clinton. Several of the decisions these individuals have made have been misunderstood and scrutinized by the general public, but they have definitely left a mark on modern day society.

Be a little misunderstood. It's okay...let's settle for GREATNESS!

FINDERS KEEPERS LOOSERS WEEPERS

Remember that saying?

Last weekend I lost my wallet. It was turned in at the airline, but an employee of the airline tried to purchase gas with my credit card. HOW SAD IS THAT!

Focusing on the good in the situation- I'm happy they returned it to me and I'm grateful that American Express noticed a fraudulent charge.

Energy Flows Where Attention Goes

The Secret has bought a lot of attention to the POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING this year. It's amazing that it's taken this DVD and book to motivate people to change their thought patterns.

I firmly believe that we should focus on the good and positive in our lives instead of the negative. If you hate your job, be thankful that you have a job.

I've found that sometimes we have to look for the silver linings in our clouds. When you are experiencing times of difficulty focus on the good, if you can't find any good to focus on start small... be thankful that you are alive, be thankful for your health, be thankful that you can walk. By focusing on the good, you will see that the negative or bad things all of sudden seem trivial or superficial and more positive things will start to happen.